Swag Pirates

MY ASS IS ON FIRE

There once was a pirate named Adam West. He was a feirce man who lived life to the fullest. Adam lived on the planet of hip lickers. Hip Lickers were total tools who licked peoples hips (because they were tools). So one day Adam West was sailing on the ocean he noticed his crew were being dumb. And he told them to get back to work they said "Shut up parent, you're not my Adam." Adam relized they were drunk so he went in to his cabin and cried himself to sleep. The next day the hip lickers were like "I bet you kiss girls, nerds." So I- I mean Adam was like "Shut up I bet you like to sleep with your arm on your butt." Then the hip lickers proceded to poop their anus's so hard that the planet shook so hard that it made god poop too. Butts were on fire. FIRE. NOW MY BUTT IS ON FIRE! AAAHHHH. FOR THE LOVE OF SAINT NICK HELP ME CLEANSE MY ANUS OF THIS UNHOLY LOG OF CHOCOLATE! HAAAALP.